Notes From A Therapist - Your Mental Health Matters

If I were to follow the several years’ worth of in depth training I have had to the letter, it would be ‘don’t get involved’ ‘remain distanced from your clients’, and yes this is wise advice. I do remain detached in some senses, you have to.  As an Advanced Life Coach, Mindfulness Practitioner, CBT Therapist and Professional Relaxation Therapist (it’s a lot I know!) I have had clients with their own struggles and we have worked together to get them to a better place. Each one equipped with a toolbox of techniques to help them navigate through life moving forward. Sometimes this can be achieved in a number of weeks, other cases months and years. Everyone is an individual and everyone is unique. 

When I receive a message telling me they no longer want to live, what am I supposed to do? Ignore that? Send them a CBT questionnaire and a link to a website? In that circumstance my compassion kicks in full throttle. I will of course reply, help as much as I can, set a focus to help in any way I can from the end of the telephone. The mental health service is in crisis, with wait times of over 16 weeks it’s just not realistic to ask someone, in such depth of despair to ‘sit tight’. That level of depression, sadness and anxiety is far from where my coaching begins. 

I am honest and open, I listen. Do I say the right thing? I don’t know, what is the right thing to say? We make a deal to keep in touch everyday. And we do, we send voice notes and messages and they don’t feel quite so alone. Slowly but surely, using different methods, regular sessions and support daily. The corner is turned and they are beginning to see where they would like to be, not where they can’t be. 

It's not possible to force individuals to get help, you can’t insist they pay for therapy, with mental health awareness being raised regularly it is becoming acceptable to speak openly about it and so it should be. Sympathy is dished out in bucket loads for a broken bone, help offered left, right and centre. You can’t struggle on with one arm, yet mentally the visible signs are limited.  Unfortunately when those do get the point where they feel they can ask for help, it simply isn’t being met. Supply and demand is in a state of crisis. 

Physiological health and physiological health are intrinsically connected, one can not be without the other. When we are mentally well our physiological selves function to the best of their ability. You can look at a person who says they are feeling stressed and under pressure and see the signs, tiredness, a paler complexion to usual, breathing faster and flustered behaviour to name the most obvious. 

There is no quick fix for mental health imbalance, just as you don’t go to the gym with a suitably soft mid drift and expect to find honed abs after one session. One session is the start, the point where you begin, repetition and consistency are what gets results. Just as you would hire a personal trainer for your physiological self, you can hire a Life Coach for your psychological self. With regular sessions and continued support, changes can be made. New habits made, some as straight forward as switching caffeine for decaffeinated, caffeine and sugar are stimulants, they are also the things that we tend to turn to when times are challenging. Anxiety loves both of them, going into over drive with a hit of caffeine and a sugary boost. Then of course, the crash once it passes through the system. By changing caffeine for decaf, herbal tea or water, you are staying in a constant and not boosting up the one thing that you are trying to calm down. There are some really lovely alternatives these days too, gone are the days of decaf tasting like gravel. 

Anxiety can be crippling; it can however be managed. We all have anxiety, it’s our fight or flight mechanism, once used to run from the lion or tiger eyeing us up for dinner. In which case the hit of adrenaline and cortisol was used by the body, to power forward and escape the impending danger. We need anxiety, it’s there to make us on high alert, to help us escape danger. 

The same response happens within your body through mental stress, the fear of not meeting a deadline, missing an important telephone call. Our body reacts in the same way as the tiger coming to make you dinner. In the modern world, we aren’t dissipating the hormones that are secreted. They are there, they stay heightened which leads to a build up and in turn higher feelings of anxiety and stress. 

This continuous build up, will have a long term effect on us physically if action isn’t taken to release the hormones and have in place coping strategies to help prevent the repeating pattern. 

Daily habits you can try, go for a short walk, pay attention to your surroundings be mindful of where you are and what you can see. 

Make some changes, swap out coffee or tea for the decaffeinated alternatives. Or try something new like a peppermint tea. There are some really nice choices that taste refreshing and not like pond water as the herbal teas of old. 

Increase your water intake, two to three litres a day. 

Have a look at your sleep quality, there’s a great sleep patter on my Facebook page through a CBT technique to reset your circadian rhythm and get good quality rest. 

Treat your mental health like your physical health, you want to be fit and well on the outside, allow yourself to be fit and well on the inside too. 

To find out more, and ways to get in touch please do take a look at:

Website: www.mooreunique.co.uk

Facebook: Moore Unique Life Coaching | Facebook

Instagram: www.instagram.com/mooreunique19